Linda McHenry

Blog

  • Social Media isn’t Social Anymore

    Social Media isn’t Social Anymore

    I don’t know about you, but when I signed up for my first social media account (Linked In), it was at the suggestion of my daughter. As a recruiter, she suggested I get my name out there and network with other business professionals. Not only could I keep up with business associates all across the country, she informed me, I’d be able to solicit writing contracts. Sounded like a plan…

    How I Used to View Social Media

    Linked In has always been a great resource. Professionally, many of the initial contacts past clients made with me were a result of viewing my Linked In profile. Currently, students attending my webinars and reading my books reach out to me via the site.

    Of course, there’s always the guys purporting to be high-ranking members of the military or physicians who are blown away by my beauty. My nearly 70-year-old, chubby, gray-haired beauty. These guys invariably apologize for seeking a personal relationship on a business site. Then again, given my beauty…

    After Linked In, I gravitated to Facebook to keep in touch with my family on the east coast when I lived in Montana. Then, when I moved back east, I created a business Facebook page and a Twitter (now X) page to keep in touch with business associates in the west.

    More recently, I created an Instagram profile so I could follow artists and watch their watercolor painting reels. (I started painting a year ago and am fascinated by how artists handle their water, paint, and brushes.)

    Here’s the thing: I joined each social media site for a specfic purpose. And that purpose was being social. Social as in keeping up with what’s happening in the lives of my family, friends, and business associates who aren’t within going-out-to-dinner distance.

    How I View Social Media Now

    When I log into my accounts now, I’m still able to engage in all the same social interactions I’ve always enjoyed. Unfortunately, my feeds and timelines have become infested with an unpleasant amount of UNsocial and ANTIsocial commentary.

    It’s probably not as much, quantity-wise, as it seems. And it’s probably just the negativity bias at work that’s upsetting me. But it still gets me down. Actually, it’s starting to make me angry.

    Not because I have a problem with people voicing their opinions. After all, I’m a writer and a 100% proponent of free speech. I believe people should be able to say whatever they want, whether it’s verbally or in writing.

    What I have a problem with is people verbalizing their opinions everywhere, regardless of the forum, 24 hours a day–without exercising common sense or consideration for others.

    I don’t want to see posts about politics, religion, abused animals, murdered women, and all kinds of negative things when I visit my social media. That stuff isn’t exactly social.

    Why can’t we have networks dedicated to conversation about ONLY politics? Or ONLY religion? Or ONLY the awful, nasty, crap that’s going on in the world? And when I want to read about that stuff, I can visit those sites? And when I want to chat with my grandkids, or watch dog videos, or keep up with my buddies in Missoula I can do JUST those things?

    Sure, I can filter what I see in my feeds and timelines. And I’ve done that. However, the fact that I’ve snoozed for 30 days the feeds of nearly one-third of my Facebook friends troubles me. And has prompted me to reconsider logging in. Maybe even cancelling my accounts.

    News, Opinion, and Social media

    Once upon a time, when I watched the news on TV or read a newspaper I believed I was watching individuals report what had happened, without bias. If bias existed (and let’s face it, it had to at some level–reporters are humans), it was frowned upon, kept to a minimum, or we didn’t know about it.

    Now, wherever we go, we’re bombarded with other people’s opinions and their biases. And often, these judgments are stated as facts. An opinion is a perspective or a judgment. A fact is something that exists. It’s real, it doesn’t just exist in someone’s mind.

    Opinions aren’t facts!

    We need to remember this.

    We should also respect the fact that not everyone cares to hear our opinions. Just because another person doesn’t share our opinion, it doesn’t automatically make that person wrong, bad, stupid, or the enemy. I suspect that if you were to share all your opinions with any one person and in exchange receive all that person’s opinions, you’d find far more you agree with than you disagree with.

    Regardless, different opinions don’t automatically make one of them right and the other wrong. Or one good and the other bad.

    If I were dating again (and let’s hope that never happens), I’d act on several biases I have. One with respect to hair color and another with repsect to certain recreational activities. Are they fair? No. Am I sharing them with you now or would I in the future tell a guy Hell, no! I won’t date you because of your disgusting X hair color or awful preference to XX in your spare time!? No, I am not and would not. Why? Because I care about your feelings and those of the (fictional) guy with the X hair and fondness for XX.

    I guess I’m concerned with what seems to be some people’s total lack of empathy for those whose opinions differ from their own.

    What’s your take on social media?

    How do you feel about social media? Is it doing what you want it to do? Are you still finding it “social?” I’m not. I’m seriously considering throwing in my towel.

    I’m so very disappointed with people I used to admire. My disappointment isn’t with their views. It’s with their intolerance. It’s with people from all walks of life, with all kinds of opinions on all sides of every issue, turning nasty, intolerant, and downright abusive.

    These people have a right to say whatever they want, whenever they want, and wherever they want. I get it. I just wish they were more considerate.

    Perhaps sharing my perspective will help them view their own from a different angle…

  • 3 Research Tips for Writers

    3 Research Tips for Writers

    We’ve all heard that “knowledge is power” and I’m all in when anyone provides research tips for writers. Before the use of technology and the Internet became my primary assistant when conducting research, I spent a LOT of time:

    • In libraries
    • Purchasing and thumbing through books and magazines
    • Conducting face-to-face interviews

    Now, I do the majority of my research online and I’m happy to share 3 research tips for writers:

    Fiction writers: naming characters

    When I create my characters’ names, I prefer them to have meaning tied to the individual character. For example, I know the name Blanche (or Blanca) is entirely inappropriate for a dark-haired woman but perfect for a blonde (or white-haired senior). But that’s only if I’m thinking about her appearance. If I’m thinking about the condition of her soul (as in pure), it would also work … and if I chose it for that reason, I’d probably spell out that her name represented her internal qualities rather than her looks.

    Being an auditory person, I like first and last names to “go” together. To sound right. Alliterative names appeal to me, but sometimes they can be too cutesy or over-the-top (e.g., Debbie Downer, Joan Bone). I like my characters’ first and last names to share at least one consonant (e.g., LiNda McHeNry–which is my real name, by the way) or one obvious vowel sound (e.g., AmY GradY). I also want the number of syllables to sound right. Bartholomew Mountbatten is alliterative but it’s a mouthful. IMO, Bartholomew Bing sounds better.

    Finally, getting ethnicity right is very important. I’ll never forget reading an article written by a bestselling author about this topic (although I can’t remember the writer’s name!). She chose a last name for her Chinese protagonist based on a number of considerations. Problem was: the name she chose was Japanese. None of her beta readers, nor her editor and agent, ever noted this inconsistency. Worse: MANY of her readers did, as evidenced by her [non-]fan mail!

    Here are two websites I find helpful when namng characters:

    • Looking for an age-appropriate name for Grandma or a teenager? The Social Security Administration has tracked the most popular baby names by year of birth. You can find it here (be sure to scroll down far enough): https://www.ssa.gov/OACT/babynames/
    • Looking for a site that lists BOTH first and last names alphabetically AND by ethnicity? This is your new go-to site: https://www.behindthename.com/

    online research tips for writers

    In no special order, here are important considerations when conducting online research:

    • NEVER rely on a single resource. Why? Because none of us is perfect and none of us knows everything. When relying on sources I find on the Internet, I don’t cite information as a fact unless I’ve verified it by at least 3 sources. My go-to number of sources is usually 5.
    • ALWAYS choose unbiased sources. For example, if I were looking to buy antivirus software for my computer and smartphone, I wouldn’t go to the websites of McAfee or Norton. Why? While each company certainly knows more about its own product than anyone else does, each company is also prejudiced in favor of its own product. When researching anything to do with technology, I rely on sites such as PCMag.com, CNET.com, and TechRadar.com. Why? They’re in the business of writing about and reviewing technology, not manufacturing or selling it.
    • NEVER rely on Wikipedia for facts. On its website, Wikipedia clearly states that just about anyone can write and edit content on the site. I’ve personally researched insurance topics on this website and, in each article I ever read, noted incorrect information. Depending upon the subject matter you’re researching, seek out sources that are unbiased and qualified. If you’re not sure how to do that, simply enter a search phrase such as: best online resources for XXX. In the case of finding an alternative to Wikipedia, you might want to type: best alternative to Wikipedia.

    for all writers: Validating sources

    Here’s a list of cautionary advice–make sure that any source you use–online or in person–is reputable and credible.

    • Verify the source’s background and history in connection with the subject at-hand. Most websites contain this information. If a site doesn’t, be wary.
    • Search for reviews and online pieces ABOUT your source.
    • Determine if the source has any bias or personal interest in the subject at-hand. If so, I recommend either disregarding the source or using at least half a dozen sources you know are impartial. Why? It’ll help you see how this one lines up in the scheme of things.
    • If the source provides evidence, facts, or supporting opinions, check them out to be sure they truly exist and are verifiable.
    • Avoid statements presented as facts without any supporting evidence or sources. Do you believe everything you read in a resume, online dating profile, or social media feed? I hope not.
    • Make sure the information you’re using is current. I can’t tell you how many articles I’ve read about the subject of insurance that appear to be current … and were written 10 or 20 years ago. Sure, the content doesn’t use dates, but references to what was going on in the world (like the September 2011 attacks) clearly date the piece and spotlight that the economy referred to in the article has changed.
    • Here’s a Forbes article that offers additional insight: https://www.forbes.com/sites/averyblank/2021/01/19/5-ways-to-identify-reliable-sources-and-maintain-your-credibility/

    Bonus: a Few writerly resources

    In addition to the resources I’ve provided above, here are a few more that you writers might find helpful:

    Keep in mind, I am not related to any of these people/businesses/sites, I’m not paid by them, don’t make payments to them, and I’m simply offering this info out of the kindess of my heart.

    I do subscribe to Writer’s Digest and am a member of The Author’s Guild, Mystery Writers of America, and Romance Writers of America because I benefit from membership in each of them. You may … or may not. Check out the list of major writer’s organizations above if you think one of them might benefit you.

    Feel free to share your favorite resources. Don’t hesitate to reach out if you have any special questions about how I conduct research.

  • 2 Cyber Security Tips for Keeping Safe Online

    2 Cyber Security Tips for Keeping Safe Online

    For the past dozen years or so, I’ve been writing insurance continuing education (CE) courses about cyber security and keeping safe online. Yes, I designed these courses for insurance licensees but they contain information that’s beneficial and essential for everyone to know.

    There are WAY more than 2 tips available. I’m just limiting myself today. You can bet I’ll be providing more in the future.

    TIP 1: Avoid Current Scams

    Right now, aside from ransomware, two of the biggest cyber security scams everyone is vulnerable to are Quick Response (QR) codes and CAPTCHA verificiation. Both were designed to keep us safe; however bad actors exploit them to take advantage of us.

    Basically, a quick response (QR) code is a form of barcode that stores retrievable data for digital devices to read. If you want the long explanation, AVAST explains it here.

    Are QR codes safe? Most sources say yes, however, bad actors do exploit them. A few years ago, they scammed the City of Austin, Texas and its residents. The bad guys replaced official QR codes on parking meters and defrauded both the city and those who parked. How? Their phony QR codes directed payments to a phony site, where the bad actors stole confidential personal and payment information. As a result, parkers were also fined for illegal parking.

    Here’s a recent article in PCWorld that tells you how to avoid these scams, which are on the rise.

    photo by jensenartofficial on Pixabay

    CAPTCHA is an acronym for technology that allows a website to detect the difference between a human visitor and a software program called a “bot”. You’ve used this tech before. You see 9 images and have to click on all of those with buses, or bicycles, or cars. Other tests require you to type a word or answer a question after having to think about or review an image. IBM explains CAPTCHA here.

    Although most sources say CAPTCHA is viewed as a great security device, it’s not always convenient or as secure as some would like. In addition, there are an increasing number of of phony CAPTCHA scams out there, as Guardio reports.

    photo by https://pixabay.com/users/simon-3/

    Tip 2: understand what makes you vulnerable

    We all believe we’re practicing safe cyber security. None of us expects to fall prey to cybercriminals or their scams. However, certain characteristics can actually make us MORE vulnerable to cybercrime than the average person. The MOST vulnerable people exhibit more than one of the following characteristics:

    • Use a WEAK password
    • Use the same password for most (or all) of their accounts
    • Work from home

    Here’s a list of the major things you want to do to keep safe in the cyber world. They’re also great tools for practicing good cyber security:

    Password

    Use a strong password: one with 16-20 characters. It should also contain a combination of upper and lowercase letters, numbers, and symbols. It should NOT contain:

    • Personal information (like your DOB, address, zip code, last four of Social Security #, etc.)
    • Consecutive numbers or letters (123 or abc)
    • Repated numbers or letters (333, 3030, or zzz)
    • Information others can easily guess (the names of your spouse, kids, or grandkids; your pets names; your favorite sports team, author, or TV show, etc.)

    password manager

    Use a password manager. Here’s a link that explains what a password manager is, how it works, and a few ratings. Sure, there’s a learning curve, but it’s worth it. Also, keep in mind that different password managers offer different features. You can choose one that’s as basic or feature-rich as you’d like.

    multi-factor authentication (mfa)

    Make sure you use multi-factor authentication (MFA), also called 2-factor authentication. Basic account logins require you to provide a user ID and password. (Ironically, the user ID is required to be your email address, which anyone can obtain! How secure is THAT?) Of course, because you know your user ID and password , other people can know them, too. This is where MFA comes in: it requires a third piece of information. This info is either something YOU HAVE or something YOU ARE. The something you have is your smartphone and an authenticator app or text messaging app that receives codes. You’re only able to login to your account after providing your user ID and password IF you also provide the code sent to your phone’s authenticator or messaging app. Of course, another method of authentication is biometrics: thumbprints, facial recognition, retina scans, etc.

    virtual private network (VPN)

    Always use a Virtual Private Network (VPN) if you’re on public WiFi. You should also use it on any network where you’re not sure of the level of security. A VPN camouflages the IP address of your device, its physical location, and encrypts the data you send and receive. Here’s a great article on PCMag that explains what a VPN is, how it works, and offers reviews of companies that provide them. I use two VPNs. One is a basic VPN with my antivirus software (that’s on all my devices). The other is a robust VPN purchased for an annual cost of about $70; I use this one when I travel.

    security updates

    Make sure you update your computer and ALL devices routinely AND when the updates are available. Did you know that you can schedule these updates so they occur when you prefer them to, rather than whenever your computer chooses to install them? Here are two articles that explain how to do this: one from PCMag and another from Tom’s Guide.

    one additional tip

    If you’re going to conduct online research about anything related to cyber security, I have a recommendation. Do NOT visit sites that have a vested interest in or bias about the subject at hand. In other words, don’t ask Microsoft or Apple who makes the best computers. Don’t ask McAfee or Norton who designed the best antivirus software. Also, don’t visit news outlets, as they often sell ads to tech companies and have a vested interest in them.

    I’ve found the following online resources to be helpful and largely objective when looking for tips, advice, etc.:

    As always, share your questions and thoughts.

  • Writer’s Block: Unsticking Yourself

    Writer’s Block: Unsticking Yourself

    I’ve found myself stuck on occasion–otherwise known as staring writer’s block in the face. I’ve tried lots of ways to unstick myself, thought I’d found the best, and just discovered the ultimate. Read on and be amazed…

    What being stuck looks like

    For me, writer’s block isn’t the inability to write; I can always write something. The block part comes when I can’t write something GOOD–otherwise known as brilliant, inspiring, or exactly the opposite of the boring, uninspiring trash I just wrote.

    Many years ago, a writer friend of mine (Nancy Harwood Bulk, who has since passed away), gave me some excellent advice. She said that if you hit a snag in your plotting, or you don’t know how your character should respond, make a list of options. And never use the first ten or twenty of them. Her take was that the first things that came to mind would also come to the mind of the reader and, therefore, were a death knell to good fiction.

    I’ve been using that advice for a long time. And, I’m sorry to say, it hasn’t helped me craft the opener my new book. (Which I’m pantsing, by the way. First time for everything.) In the past two weeks, I’ve rewritten the opener about eight times and changed the starting point as many times. I’m nearly bald from ripping my hair out.

    Image by luxstorm from Pixabay

    What getting unstuck looks like

    Because what we writers do when we hit a snag is conduct online research and become embroiled in procrastination, I began searching for creativity tips. Lo and behold, the creativity gods smiled and pointed me in the direction of my latest treasure. In turn, I’m sharing it with you.

    You’re welcome.

    After following this guy’s advice I completely turned around my block and have a TON of excellent ideas to work with … and already started putting them into action. I share the link three paragraphs down.

    My first go-to for any advice about writing is Writer’s Digest and it had some great articles. If you don’t already have a subscription, get one. The online version is much less expensive than the paper/mailed version. I get both.

    I stumbled across several by Jane Friedman, whom I love, which prompted me to visit her website. And that’s where I struck gold. FYI, I don’t know her, never met her, and am not being compensated in any way for this recommendation. She’s just too good not to share.

    Jason Keath wrote an article on her website in October of last year, which I obviously missed. Clearly, Karma knew I’d need it more now than I did then … and that you would too. Bad Ideas for More Creative Writing (https://janefriedman.com/3-bad-ideas-for-more-creative-writing/) contains three different tips:

    • The Bad Idea Method
    • Constraint Questions
    • The Fast & Ugly Draft

    The Bad Idea Method worked for me and is now my new go-to. How do you get unstuck? What do you think of Jason’s ideas?

  • Do Crystals Really have healing energy?

    Do Crystals Really have healing energy?

    If you conduct research online, you see conflicting opinions about the beneficial effects of crystals, or crystal healing. Scientists pooh-pooh their ability to cure or alleviate stress and medical conditions. Others swear by their healing properties.

    What’s your go-to when you’re upset? Do you grab a snack? Smoke a cigarette? Go for a run? Or do you reach for a rock, or a piece of glass, or a favorite necklace, bracelet, or ring?

    Crystal Energy

    No matter what you do when you’re upset, you DO something. And that involves energy. The energy of digesting, breathing smoke into your lungs, or getting those muscles moving. The energy of going inward, joining your mind and body through touch.

    Now, if you know me (or even got a good look at me), you know I’m a fan of eating and not so much of a fan when it comes to spending time exercising. Fortunately, I’ve never smoked. And I’m always reaching for that crystal—whether it’s a stone I can pocket, hold in my hand, or wear as jewelry.

    I have crystals scattered all around my house. Tumbled stones in glass dishes and seashells. Palm stones, worry stones, and raw/untreated pieces on my desk and night table. Towers and free forms on my bookshelves. I feel their energy and, because they often calm me, I feel “crystal healing.”

    When my grandson was about seven years old, he discovered the crystals in my living room. He asked if he could pick his favorite stone in each of the glass bowls. See the image of the stones in the heart-shaped dish? Those are the stones he chose … and they’re all aventurine, just different colors. When I asked him why he picked those stones he shrugged. “I just like them, Grammy.”

    Blue, green, yellow, and orange aventurine

    Favorite crystals

    What crystals, rocks, or stones do you “just like?” I’m always drawn to the jaspers and agates. I also have an affinity for some types of quartz. Rose quartz and amethyst are the most popular, but their energy seldom resonates with me. I prefer Herkimer, clear, and smoky quartz, along with citrine.

    The energy in some crystals is too strong for me. I feel weird when I wear them. I think malachite is one of the most beautiful crystals out there regardless of whether it’s the deep, dark green of a natural untreated stone, or the multicolored stripes of a tumbled stone. Unfortunately, when I wear it I get a headache.

    I prefer the red and brown and green jaspers; I find them calming and grounding when I’m stressed. And I haven’t found an agate I don’t like. My favorites are moss agate and Montana agate. I sleep better when I wear moss agate and aventurine bracelets on my left wrist. Normally, I don’t remember my dreams; but when I wear Montana agate to bed, I do.

    Your take

    What’s your take on crystals and the energy they emit? Do you have a favorite crystal?

    Rose quartz and amethyst
    Sodalite, pink tourmaline/rubellite, garnet
    Black obsidian, sardonyx, and black tourmaline
    Clockwise from top, striped stone: green onyx, peach moonstone, fire agate, carnelian, fire agate, red onyx, and sunstone in the middle
    Moss agate tower, bracelet, palm stone, and tumbled stone